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Hollywood would have us believe sex is limited to people under age 40. Recent studies show the a sizable percentage of Americans are remaining sexually active into their 70s, 80s and beyond. We have to be honest, there are obstacles both physical and psychological to maintain a healthy sex life as we age.

The good news is after years of research in longevity studies found number of practices that can help couples no matter what age have a good sex life. A couple that have a satisfying sex life, their feelings of fondness and intimacy can grow stronger and that improve every aspect of their lives.

Sex and intimacy can literally add years to your life. Numerous studies have shown that close relationships are a key to maintaining good mental and physical health as we get older. Keep in mind that emotional closeness can exist without sexual intimacy. A good sexual relationship helps enrich our closest relationship. It can be an important contributor to a long healthy life. The bottom line is if you give up on good sex life you may die sooner.

We need to ignore what society tells us about aging and sex. The idea of older people having sex is thought to be a rarity. This stereotype can’t be further from the truth. A study of sexual activity among older Americans published in the New England Journal of Medicine showed that more than 1/2 of men and women between age of 65 and 74 and more than 1/4 of those between 75 and 85 have been sexually active within the previous 12 months. Among those to report that they are were in good or excellent health these figures for considerably higher. Don’t let society false stereotype keep you from one of the greatest joys of life.

You want to take care of your health. A healthy blood flow to the sexual organs is essential for sexual response. That’s why maintaining good cardiovascular health including managing cholesterol levels and blood pressure as well as exercising is key to a good sex life. It’s also vital if you have diabetes you need to control it. Diabetes can kill your sexuality because it damages the cardiovascular system and your body’s peripheral nerves.

You want to discuss with your doctor to see if there are any medications you take that might be affecting your sexual desire or response. Anti-depressants can significantly reduce your libido. Diuretics and beta-blockers used for high blood pressure can cause erectile dysfunction. Ask your doctor about alternative drugs that won’t affect your sex life.

You want to steer clear of alcohol. A character in Macbeth famously said of alcohol “It provoked the desires but it takes away the performance.” He was right. Alcohol can make us want more sex but it will affect performance. When women in particular say that the sexual pleasure is increased after drinking is most likely because alcohol reduces psychological inhibition but even one drink can reduce a woman’s vaginal blood flow and lubrication. I will also decrease the intensity for women. For men intoxication can severely reduce the ability to achieve an erection. It will also reduce intensity of orgasm for men. Regular alcohol consumption even without intoxication will lower testosterone levels, which will affect the quality of your erection and orgasm.

Many couples don’t realize it is normal for an older man to need to have his penis physically stimulated to achieve erection. Just thinking about sex or even kissing and other foreplay isn’t enough. Ladies this is not an indication of diminished desire.

We all know hormones play a great role in sex:

For men: If you’re unhappy with your sexual response after following this article, see an endocrinologist to check out your levels of testosterone and thyroid hormones. A low level of either can dampen your sexual desire and ability. Hormone supplements can be prescribed.

Older women: Women often experience vaginal dryness, which can make intercourse far less enjoyable or sometimes impossible. This problem can be solved by applying an over-the-counter non-oil based lubricant just before sex. For more spontaneity use a moisturizing insert. These moisturizing inserts can last for several hours to several days. You should also avoid moisturizing inserts that are oil based. Don’t use lubricant such as petroleum jelly and baby oil. They can remain in the vagina and create a breeding ground for infections. If a lubricant isn’t enough to make sex comfortable ask your doctor about a topical form of the hormone estrogen. This can be applied to your vagina to increase your body’s ability to lubricate itself.

Keep all your flames burning if you want a satisfying sex life. Set aside time for non-sexual intimacy on a regular basis. This kind of intimate encounter may not always lead to sex but it will create a fit psychological closeness that encourages physical intimacy.

If you have a fitness question or concern, write to “Tips to be Fit,” P.O. Box 53443, Philadelphia, PA 19105 or send an email to tipstobefit@gmail.com. Past articles can be found at www.phillytrib.com by searching “Tips to be Fit.”

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